By Alissa Reicherter & Brooke Geller

“Do you need some help?” Brooke heard while an outstretched arm reached out to her from above the dusty fold-up card table. She looked up, grabbed her colleague’s hand, and slowly crawled from under the table. She wiped the dust on her shirt, then wiped her eyes, careful not to get dust in them.

Why was Brooke sitting under a table? Let alone crying under one? Well, in the spring of 2016, we (Alissa and Brooke) were curating collections of mystery books for a large classroom library project that had the potential to impact the reading lives of children nationwide positively. We spent endless hours reading mystery books we thought were engaging and appropriate for a wide range of third graders to enjoy. Our eyes strained, and our backs ached. But we persevered, driven by our shared passion for creating the perfect collection for children to enjoy and a collection for which teachers would be grateful.

One Friday afternoon, we organized the books into neat piles and felt proud of our accomplished work, only to return a few days later to ransacked piles. Despite our best efforts, our curated piles did not pass a weekend audit, and we were back to the beginning—charged with reading books all over again and starting from scratch. The news hit us like many bricks, leaving us defeated and overwhelmed.

Surrounded by thousands of children’s books and no place to sit, Brooke found the only quiet place to compose herself – under the fold-up card table covered in children’s books. She grabbed one of the mystery books to reread and suddenly cried instead, her sobs muffled by the surrounding books.

Brooke’s Perspective: 

Later that morning, Alissa arrived only to see the curated piles of books spread across the fold-up card table, which we had found comfort in working at for weeks already. By then, I had stopped crying and updated Alissa on our failed weekend audit and the unexpected work ahead. I could tell Alissa was processing the unexpected news I shared with her while touching the books on the fold-out card table. She took a deep breath, and before I knew it, she cried like I had done hours earlier. I knew what to do. I pushed some books aside to make room for us, and we sat on the cold floor together, surrounded by books.

Alissa’s Perspective: 

When I arrived that morning, my heart sank at seeing our meticulously organized piles in complete disarray. As Brooke filled me in on the situation, the unexpected setback came crashing down on me. The stress and disappointment building over weeks finally spilled over, and I cried alongside Brooke. At that moment, sitting on the cold floor surrounded by books, I was grateful for our friendship and the understanding we shared.

Our Shared Reflection: 

This episode occurred almost ten years ago, and to this day, it is a metaphor for our friendship and a powerful lesson about the importance of taking time to sit, literally and figuratively. In the fast-paced world of education, where demands are constant, and the to-do list seems never-ending, we often forget the value of pausing, of sitting with our emotions and experiences.

In this context, sitting is not about an action. Instead, it’s about intentional presence. When Brooke was under the table and Alissa joined her on the floor, we were engaging in a powerful act of acknowledgment. We were permitting ourselves to feel overwhelmed and vulnerable and to process our emotions.

This moment teaches us several important lessons:

1. Process All the Feels: Sitting with our feelings, we can acknowledge and work through our disappointment and frustration, leading us to clarity and new goals. Consider doing the same the next time overwhelming feelings rush over you.
2. Connection: Sitting together allows for a profound shared understanding and support. As Zaretta Hammond teaches in her book Culturally Responsive Teaching and the Brain, the brain is wired for social connection and actively seeks positive relationships for protection and connection.
3. Self-Care: Taking a moment to sit, especially during times of stress, can be a crucial act of self-preservation and mental health maintenance. Even if sitting means under a table, make space for self-care. 
4. Unconventional Comfort: Sometimes, “sitting” might mean finding a quiet corner, hiding under a table, or pausing amid chaos. The critical part is the act of stopping and being present. Just breathe.
5. Fresh Perspective: After sitting with our emotions and each other, we were better equipped to face the challenge ahead.

The overwhelming nature of that moment – the sheer volume of books to reread, the pressure of the project’s importance, and the emotional toll of seeing our hard work seemingly undone – could have easily broken our spirits individually. However, our friendship became a source of strength and resilience. We understood each other’s dedication to the project and the emotional investment we had both made. This shared experience, as challenging as it was, deepened our bond and reinforced the importance of having a trusted friend and colleague to lean on during difficult times.

Educators often focus on action—teaching, planning, grading, and meeting. But this experience reminds us that sometimes, the most productive thing we can do is sit—sit with our emotions, sit with our colleagues, sit with our students. Sometimes, we find strength, clarity, and connection in these sitting moments.

School days are busy. Getting wrapped up in procedures, paperwork, and the emotions of being present for children takes work. Pause and find comfort from a friend whose classroom is down the hall from you. Pick up the phone and call a fellow administrator in another building to check-in. Send a quick text to a friend you haven’t connected with. As educators, we always care for other people, and sometimes, we forget that we can cast our nets even more comprehensively; we can look to relationships with students and families to work through challenges hand-in-hand.

We are in the thick of a new school year, and every moment can be memorable and emotional. Lean into them, embrace them with outstretched arms and a sense of connection, and remember the power of setting the next time you feel overwhelmed. Whether under a table, on a classroom floor, or in a quiet corner of the staff room, give yourself permission to pause, feel, and connect. These moments of sitting are the key to moving forward with renewed energy and perspective.

This is the first post in our series, “Ways to Sit.” Stay tuned for more insights from our shared experiences as educators and friends.